Tuesday, November 18, 2008
... So God exists, by Iba Bouramine
The arguments are listed in no particular order. For the most recent additions, go to the end of the list.
1. TRANSCEND ARGUMENT
(1) God exists.
(2) If God exists, so if there is reason God exists
(3) The reason exists.
(4) So God exists.
2. COSMOLOGIC ARGUMENT
(1) If I say that something must have a cause, it has a cause.
(2) I say that the universe must have a cause.
(3) Therefore the universe has a cause.
(4) So God exists.
3. ONTOLOGIC ARGUMENT (I)
(1) I define God as X.
(2) Since I can conceive X, X must exist.
(3) Therefore God exists.
4. ONTOLOGIC ARGUMENT (II)
(1) God exists.
(2) Since God exists, God must be perfect.
(3) What is perfect must exist.
(4) So God exists.
5. ARGUMENT ONTOLOGIQUE MODAL
(1) God exists.
(2) Since God exists, it is either necessary or superfluous.
(3) God is not superfluous, then God must be necessary.
(4) So God exists.
6. TELEOLOGIC ARGUMENT
(1) Look at this tree. It is not nice?
(2) So God exists.
7. ARGUMENT PLEA BY MIRACLES
(1) My Aunt Helen would probably die of cancer.
(2) That has not happened.
(3) Therefore God exists.
8. MORAL ARGUMENT (I)
(1) Mr X, a known atheist, was morally inferior to the rest of us.
(2) So God exists.
9. MORAL ARGUMENT (II)
(1) In my youth I was a bastard jurais and I, drank, smoked, played, children fighting, stealing, was murdered and pee in bed.
(2) That changed when I became religious.
(3) Therefore God exists.
10. ARGUMENT PLEA BY THE CREATION
(1) If the theory of evolution is false, then creationism is true, then God exists.
(2) Changes can not be true, because I do not have the mental capacity to understand. In addition, accept me make uncomfortable.
(3) Therefore God exists.
11. ARGUMENT BY FEAR
(1) If there is no God then we will all die.
(2) So God exists.
12. ARGUMENT PLEA BY THE BIBLE
(1) [arbitrary passage of the Old Testament]
(2) [arbitrary passage of the new testament]
(3) Therefore God exists.
13. ARGUMENT PLEA BY INTELLIGENCE
(1) Listen, this is really not worth trying to explain all this to you other idiots of atheists - it's too complicated for you. God exists, even if it does not like you.
(2) So God exists.
14. ARGUMENT PLEA BY UNINTELLIGENT
(1) OK, I pretend not be as smart as you people - it is clear that you are grown. But I read the Bible, and anything you say can convince me that God does not exist. I feel in my heart, and you may feel as if inviting you in your life. "For God so loved the world that he sent his only son for all those who believe in him should not perish point." John 3:16.
(2) So God exists.
15. PLEA BY THE CREED
(1) If God exists, then I should believe in him.
(2) I believe in God.
(3) Therefore God exists.
16. PLEA BY BULLYING
(1) You see this stake?
(2) So God exists.
17. PARENTAL ARGUMENT
(1) My dad and my mom told me that God existed.
(2) So God exists.
18. PLEA BY THE NUMBERS
(1) Millions and millions of people believe in God.
(2) They can not all be wrong, is it not?
(3) Therefore God exists.
19. PLEA BY ABSURDITY
(1) Maranatha!
(2) So God exists.
20. PLEA THROUGH PLEA ECONOMY
(1) God exists, band bastards!
(2) So God exists.
21. PLEA OF BOATWRIGHT
(1) Ha ha ha.
(2) So God exists.
22. PLEA DORE
(1) I forgot to take my medication.
(2) So I AM THE CHRIST!
(3) Therefore God exists.
23. PLEA BY THE CONTROL OF THE GUITAR
(1) Eric Clapton is God.
(2) So God exists.
24. PLEA BY THE INTERNET
(1) There is a website that successfully argues the existence of God.
(2) Here is the URL.
(3) Therefore God exists.
25. PLEA BY INCOMPREHENSIBILITY
(1) Flabble glurk zoom boink blubb snurgleschnortz ping!
(2) No one has ever refuted (1)
(3) Therefore God exists.
26. PLEA BY THE AMERICAN EVANGELICAL
(1) By telling others that God exists, I became rich to die.
(2) So God exists.
27. PLEA MITCHELL
(1) The Christian God exists.
(2) Thus, all visions of the world who do not take into account the Christian God are false and incomprehensible.
(3) Therefore God exists.
28. PLEA BY BLINDNESS (I)
(1) Atheists are spiritually blind.
(2) So God exists.
29. PLEA BY BLINDNESS (II)
(1) God is love.
(2) Love is blind.
(3) Ray Charles is blind.
(4) So Ray Charles is God.
(5) So God exists.
30. PLEA BY THE FALLIBILITY
(1) The human reasoning is inherently defective.
(2) So it is not reasonably possible to criticize a proposal.
(3) I propose that God exists.
(4) So God exists.
31. PLEA BY THE ADEQUACY
(1) God exists.
(2) I do not care that you believe or not. I have better things to do than to convince you, stupid band.
(3) Therefore God exists.
32. PLEA BY THE META-SUFFICIENT
(1) Go to hell.
(2) So God exists.
33. PLEA BY EVENTS
(1) If you turn your head sideways and squint your eyes a little, you'll see the image of a bearded face on the pancake.
(2) So God exists.
34. PLEA SLATHER
(1) My toaster is God.
(2) So God exists.
35. PLEA BY THE DEVASTATION INCOMPLETE
(1) A plane crashed killing the crew and 143 passengers.
(2) But one child survived with only third-degree burns.
(3) Therefore God exists.
36. PLEA BY POSSIBLE WORLDS
(1) If things had been different, then things would be different.
(2) It would not be good.
(3) Therefore God exists.
37. PLEA BY THE FORCE OF THE WILL
(1) I believe in God! I believe in God! I really really really really in God!
(2) So God exists.
38. PLEA BY THE INCREDIBLE
(1) The majority of the world's population does not believe in Christianity.
(2) That is exactly the intention of Satan.
(3) Therefore God exists.
39. PLEA BY EXPERIENCE POST-MORTEM
(1) Mr X. died atheist.
(2) He now realizes his mistake.
(3) Therefore God exists.
40. PLEA BY EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL
(1) God loves you.
(2) How can you be so heartless to not believe in him?
(3) Therefore God exists.
41. PLEA BY INCOHERENT GIBBERISH
(1) You see this person who is delusional contortionist in the basement of the church, which éructe into an incoherent gibberish?
(2) Thus, the infinite wisdom is revealed.
(3) Therefore God exists.
42. PLEA TO OPRAH (I)
(1) The human spirit exists.
(2) So God exists.
43. PLEA TO OPRAH (II)
(1) Watch this clip.
(2) How could anyone see that and not believe in God?
(3) Therefore God exists.
44. CALVIN ARGUMENT
(1) If God exists, then he let me watch you suffer eternal torture.
(2) I like this idea.
(3) Therefore God exists.
45. PLEA BY THE DISHWASHER (I)
(1) The pots do not order the potter.
(2) So God exists.
46. PLEA BY MASS PRODUCTION
(1) The Barbie dolls were created.
(2) If Barbie dolls were created, then the trees too.
(3) Therefore God exists.
47. PLEA BY RESEARCH
(1) God is everywhere.
(2) We were not anywhere to prove he was not there.
(3) Therefore God exists.
48. STATEMENT BY THE ARGUMENT IN CAPITALS
(1) GOD EXISTS! YOU MUST BE Y!
(2) So God exists.
49. PLEA BY THE INFINITE REGRESSION
(1) Ask atheists what caused the Big Bang.
(2) Whatever the answer, ask how they know it.
(3) Continue this process until the atheist admits he does not know the answer to your questions.
(4) You have won!
(5) So God exists.
50. PLEA BY DISBELIEF
(1) How God could not exist, dummy?
(2) So God exists.
51. ARGUMENT IN HISTORY
(1) The Bible is true.
(2) So the Bible is a historical fact.
(3) Therefore God exists.
52. PLEA BY THE RESURRECTION
(1) Evidence of the existence of God, you will when you leave your body falls.
(2) So God exists.
53. PLEA BY BIOGENESIS
(1) Where is Adam, big booby?
(2) So God exists.
54. PLEA BY UNSHAKEABLE FAITH
(1) There are many very cool people who believe in God all their lives.
(2) So God exists.
55. PLEA BY THE SOLITUDE
(1) Christians say that Jesus is their best friend.
(2) I'm alone and I want a best friend.
(3) Therefore God exists.
56. ARGUMENT IN THE ARGUMENT
(1) God exists.
(2) [-argument against the atheist]
(3) If it exists.
(4) [-argument against the atheist]
(5) But if there!
(6) [-argument against the atheist]
(7) BUT IF THERE!
(8) [the atheist left and returned home]
(9) So God exists.
57. PLEA BY THE CREATIVE INTERPRETATION
(1) God is:
(a) The feeling that we experienced watching a newborn.
(b) The love of a mother for her child.
(c) The quiet little voice in your heart.
(d) The potential for humanity to overcome its difficulties
(e) What I feel watching a sunset.
(f) The taste of ice cream a day heatwave.
(2) So God exists.
58. PLEA BY INSECURITY
(1) We have made absolutely senseless efforts to establish that atheists are fools laughable.
(1.5) In fact, we hope that mitigate our own insecurity about theism - but it is completely impossible that we admit.
(2) So atheists are fools laughable.
(3) Therefore God exists.
59. PLEA BY THE HIGHER
(1) If God does not exist, then I am an inferior being, since I am not "special" in the cosmic sense.
(2) But I'm superior. Because I am a Christian.
(3) Therefore God exists.
60. PLEA BY THE PERFECTION
(1) If there are absolute moral standards, then God exists.
(2) Atheists say that there is no absolute moral standards.
(3) But because they do not want to admit they are sinners.
(4) So there are absolute moral standards.
(5) So God exists.
61. PLEA BY THE HUMAN NEED
(1) Atheists say they do not need God.
(2) This just proves they need God.
(3) Therefore God exists.
62. PLEA BY THE LOGIC CACHEE
(1) Intellectually, I know that the existence of God is impossible or unlikely widely.
(2) But I must maintain the appearance of being cool and intellectual in front of my fellow Christian apologists.
(3) So I must say that (1) is false.
(4) So God exists.
63. PLEA BY HEALING
(1) Atheists like to think they can control their desires and emotions.
(2) But they can not because they are atheists.
(3) Therefore, atheists feel the need to assuage any of their desires, without worrying about committing a sin.
(4) This simply shows that they need God in their lives.
(5) So God exists.
64. PLEA BY HATRED
(1) Some atheists hate Christians and Christianity.
(2) That is why they do not believe in God.
(3) Pathetic, is not it?
(4) So God exists.
65. PLEA BY QUENTIN SMITH
(1) Professor of Philosophy Quentin Smith said that God does not exist.
(2) But God exists.
(3) So Quentin Smith can not be accepted as an expert, since it is wrong.
(4) So God exists.
66. PLEA BY EVIL SPIRITS
(1) I have just been contacted by evil spirits.
(2) So God exists.
67. PLEA BY THE LOGIC CACHEE
(1) Atheists say that God does not exist.
(2) But they say it simply because they want to maintain the appearance of being cool and intellectuals in front of their fellow atheists.
(3) I am not fooled!
(4) So God exists.
68. PLEA BY THE CHALLENGE OF HOVIND
(1) The American creationist Kent Hovind has offered $ 250,000 (which exist or not) to anyone who can demonstrate the truth of evolution (defined as a natural and acausal origin of the universe) beyond a reasonable doubt (ie certainty of 100% without any possibility whatsoever) before a neutral committee (chosen by Hovind himself) and according to certain criteria (carefully drafted to eliminate any possibility whatsoever that this challenge has ever won).
(2) No atheist has ever won this challenge.
(3) Therefore God exists.
69. PLEA BY MENTAL ILLNESS
(1) No person of sound mind could invent Christianity.
(2) So it must be true.
(3) Therefore God exists.
70. PLEA BY EXHAUST (abbreviated)
(1) Do you agree with the proposal absolutely trivial X?
(2) Atheist: of course.
(3) And what about the proposal slightly modified X '?
(4) Atheist: uh, no, not really.
(5) Good. Since we agree, what about Y? Is this true?
(6) Atheist: No! And I did not agree with X '!
(7) Since the veracity of the foregoing is clearly established, you are surely agree that Z is true?
(8) Atheist: Not. So far, I do agree with X! Where do you come, right?
(9) I am glad that we all agree ...
....
(37) So now we have used the proposals X, X ', Y, Y', Z, Z ', P, P, Q and Q' to get to the point clearly valid R. Okay?
(38) Atheist: As I said, so far, I have been in agreement with X. Where do you come?
....
(81) So we conclude from this that the proposals L''L'' 'and J''are true. Okay?
(82) I'M NOT AGREE WITH ANY OF WHAT YOU SAID SINCE X! WHERE YOU WANT TO COME IN?
....
(177) ... and it follows that the proposals HRV, SHQ''and BTU 'are undoubtedly valid. Okay?
(178) [the atheist fainted from overwork, or share disgusted.]
(179) So God exists.
71. PLEA BY THE QUESTION GENERAL (OF MR. GOODSALT)
(1) Question for the atheist: [issue apparently random]
(2) Your answer is false.
(3) Therefore God exists.
72. PLEA BY THE PEACOCK ORIGINALITY
(1) I wrote the following to demonstrate the existence of God.
(2) [insert full text of an article of theologian William Lane Craig]
(3) Therefore God exists.
73. PLEA BY THE PEACOCK LIMITED VOCABULARY
(1) You use a lot of complicated words.
(2) So you can not expect that I understand your refutation of my position.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
74. PLEA BY THE PEACOCK SELECTIVE MEMORY
(1) [Christian raises a question that he believed that atheists have no answer]
(2) [atheist answered the question]
(3) [a time]
(4) [Christian repeats the question]
(5) [atheist repeat the answer]
(6) [a time]
(7) [Christian repeats the question]
(8) [atheist repeat the answer]
(9) Atheist, you never answered my question.
(10) So God exists.
75. PLEA BY ECONOMETRICS DIVINE
(1) The rich nations are Protestant.
(2) So God exists.
76. PLEA BY THE SPIRIT OF PERSONAL SANITÀ
(1) I have had religious experiences that can not be explained unless I'm crazy or that God exists.
(2) So God exists.
77. LIFE PLEA BY INSTITUTIONAL
(1) The Roman Catholic Church has been there for long.
(2) So God exists.
78. PLEA BY INEVITABILITY
(1) I have proof that God exists.
(2) I will not bore you say because, as you are atheists, you would anyway hostile to the conclusion.
(3) Therefore God exists.
79. ARGUMENT IN "THE MATRIX"
(1) It can not prove that we do not live in a world like the movie "The Matrix."
(2) So we can not know the reality.
(3) If the reality is contingent, then anything is possible.
(4) So God exists.
80. PLEA BY SUBJECTIVITY
(1) Everything is subjective.
(2) No evidence subjective can not be superior to another subjective evidence.
(3) Based on my subjective opinion, your opinion that if everything is subjective then God himself is subjective, is false.
(4) So God exists (objectively).
81. ARGUMENT BY POSTMODERNISM
(1) I will prove that God exists.
(2) [insert any of the arguments of this page]
(3) [atheist refutes the argument]
(4) I can not prove that there is a God, any more than you can prove that we exist in a world really tangible.
(5) So God exists.
82. PLEA BY SQUARE CIRCLES
(1) A square circle does not exist.
(2) God is not square a circle.
(3) Therefore God exists.
83. PLEA BY THE DICTATORSHIP
(1) Dictators do not believe in God.
(2) Dictators are wrong.
(3) Therefore God exists.
84. PLEA BY DIVINE RIGHT
(1) God Save The Queen.
(2) The Queen of England is not dead.
(3) Therefore God exists.
85. PLEA BY THE NUMBERS BENDER
(1) I found two functions that have (to 7 decimal places) a common root.
(2) Some of the numbers that make up these functions are numbers used for many things in the Bible.
(3) Since there is a small probability of finding two functions that are "found in nature (whatever it may mean) and are also" biblically significant '(whatever this may mean, too), it is clear that to find these functions was not a coincidence.
(4) So God gave me these functions.
(5) So God exists.
86. BENDER PLEA BY NUMBERS (abbreviated)
(1) 36.5
(2) So God exists.
87. META-ARGUMENT
(1) There is evidence of the existence of God.
(2) If the reader finishes reading this evidence, the existence of God be proven.
(3) If the existence of God is proven, then God exists.
(4) So God exists.
88. PLEA BY ANECDOTES
(1) God can be seen by those who believe.
(2) If God is seen, then God must exist.
(3) I believe in God.
(4) So God exists.
89. PLEA BY THE BIBLICAL STORY
(1) Many modern historians believe that there was probably someone named Jesus, maybe.
(2) So God exists.
90. BENDER PLEA BY DEMONS OF TAP DANCERS
(1) One day, demons danced tap on my roof. I prayed and they left.
(2) So the demons are really good dancers.
(3) And then also, God exists.
91. PLEA RANDMAN
(1) This article from the Encyclopedia Hachette, 1975, the evolution contains errors, I say that having already documented.
(2) So, Dr in evolutionary biology, this proves that evolution is a scientific concept deficient.
(3) Therefore God exists.
92. PLEA BY THE MULTIPLICITY
(1) I have many arguments for the existence of God.
(2) One of them is probably true.
(3) Therefore God exists.
93. PLEA BY COINCIDENCE INCIDENTAL
(1) What are the chances of that happening?
(2) Very low, that's for sure.
(3) Therefore God exists.
94. PLEA BY GERARD MAJAX BENDER
(1) If Gerard Majax because of the real magic, then God exists.
(2) It's true air in his broadcast on TV.
(3) Therefore God exists.
95. PLEA BY THE USE OF MYSTERIOUS PREPOSITIONS
(1) It is impossible to disprove God with your tiny human intellect, unless you are above God.
(2) Are you above God?
(3) I will interpret your air speechless as a "no".
(4) So God exists.
96. PLEA BY CHRISTIAN YOUTH MOVEMENT OF TEENAGERS
(1) Yo, man, God he is super giant, and if you did seem to find Christian rock bands listen, you're accountable.
(2) And then, our group leader Momo, once it has ben cured a broken leg using only the power of God Almighty.
(3) Therefore God exists.
97. PLEA BY SPEAKING IN TONGUES
(1) My boyfriend, then began to speak once spontaneously in a gibberish that seemed similar to Russian.
(2) But neither he nor I know anything to the Russian language.
(3) The only explanation is God.
(4) So God exists.
98. PLEA BY THE EUROPEAN HISTORY
(1) Many thinkers in the pre-modern Europe believed in God.
(2) If you wish, forget the 19th and 20th century.
(3) Therefore, God exists.
99. PLEA BY THE DEVELOPER
(1) If there is a designer, then God must exist.
(2) If I find a watch in the forest, then there must be a designer.
(3) * casts its shows in the forest
(4) So God exists.
100. ARGUMENT IN THE FUTURE
(1) I will prove the existence of God in an argument that will follow.
(2) So God exists.
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Labels: Creationism, Human mistake, Iba Bouramine, Religion and fanaticism
# posted by Francis Chartrand @ 10:24 PM 
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